Glasgow goes speed crazy

According to the Evening Times newspaper, Glasgow City Council’s roads boss wants to implement a 20mph speed limit across much of the city by 2010. The zone will stretch from the High Street in the East to the M8 in the West, and from Dobbie’s Loan in the North to the River Clyde (if you don’t know Glasgow believe me, that’s a huuuuuuuge area). I’ve no idea why the south side’s getting away with it, the sods.

It’s a fascinating plan, and I can only assume that it involves getting rid of most of the traffic lights, roadworks, one way streets, buses and other obstructions – because unless you’re a taxi driver or a bus with your special no-plebs lanes, reaching 20mph in the city centre is as likely as exceeding the speed of light, solving the tensions in the Middle East and finding Jimmy Carr funny. Simultaneously.

Me, I reckon the answer to congestion – other than regulating the sodding buses, which are a major part of the problem – is to issue traffic wardens with time-bombs and orders to plant them on the ignorant sods who block box junctions. That, and give me a licence to use a rocket launcher on people who try to jump traffic queues.