Bigmouth Strikes Again: Carrie Marshall's blog

Carrie’s books | Carrie’s band

Author: Carrie

  • Friends like these

    It’s trans day of visibility today, which means we get to see the rank hypocrisy of politicians tweeting about their supposed support for trans people while openly supporting the removal of trans people’s rights.

    The latest front in the forever war against trans people is pushing the idea of “parents’ rights”. Based on a report from a right-wing think tank, a report fronted by horrific transphobe and Labour MP Rosie Duffield, multiple newspapers have run stories this week expressing their anger that some schools are not notifying parents of teens changing their pronouns or appearance. Or as it’s better described, following the law and safeguarding kids from potential abuse.

    The report comes from Policy Exchange, which is very clearly rubber-stamping already decided policy. The tories intend to use trans people as political footballs in the next election – something they’ve stated openly – and this latest scaremongering gives them the opportunity to say they are responding to the will of the people. People who are being repeatedly and cynically misled by a primarily right-wing press pushing narratives created by the Christian Right. Parents’ rights is the label currently being used by Republicans all over the US to try and eliminate trans teens by removing their protections and healthcare.

    And Labour? Kier Starmer never met a transphobe he didn’t like, so of course he is entirely with the tories on this one.

    For the benefit of people who aren’t LGBT+ or who don’t work with vulnerable people, the reason we have safeguarding is because parents are often the most dangerous people of all. Many of the horrors LGBT+ people experience are perpetrated by their families and communities. “Corrective rape” and other forms of sexual abuse. Domestic violence. Conversion therapy. LGBT+ people are much more likely to be made homeless by their parents, and to be made homeless at much younger ages; in the UK, almost 1/4 of young homeless people are LGBT+. That’s horrifically disproportionate.

    LGBT+ people know this. Teachers know this. And I suspect the politicians do too, but they simply don’t care. To them, LGBT+ lives simply don’t matter.

    As one teacher posted in response to the news:

    My first year teaching, a girl I taught got caught kissing another girl behind the gymnasium. She begged our admin not to tell them it was a girl – just say she got caught kissing someone. They refused.

    The next day she came in with a swollen jaw.

  • Happy and we know it

    This photo is the front page of the Washington Post, in which it surveyed hundreds of trans people and found that the overwhelming majority of us – nearly 80% – said our lives were happier post-transition. And as any trans person could have predicted, the people who said their lives weren’t happier said it was largely because of how other people treated them, how they found it hard to access healthcare and so on.

    None of this is remotely surprising to me, but the fact that it’s a front page newspaper story does surprise me. It’s such a contrast to how trans people are usually discussed in broadsheets, such as The Times here and the New York Times in the US: most coverage is framed on the assumption that to be trans is a terrible thing, the worst of all possible outcomes, a “contagion” to be eliminated.

  • Lend me your lugs

    I love audiobooks, especially ones read by the author. And it turns out I really love recording audiobooks, especially ones written by me.

    The audiobook of CKAM is making its way to your favourite audiobook providers; it’s already live on Kobo and should appear on Audible very soon too.

    In addition to the narrator (me) talking about my favourite subject (me), there’s a wee audio treat in one of the latter chapters. And you can hear me being highly amused by my own jokes throughout.

    I hope you enjoy listening to it as much as I enjoyed recording it.

  • Believe them

    This is a picture from an anti-trans rally in Melbourne yesterday. The men you see in the picture are neo-Nazis, members of the Nationalist Socialist Movement, and there are multiple videos and photos showing them proudly doing the Nazi salute. The reason you don’t see any swastikas is because displaying them in public in Victoria means fines of thousands of dollars.

    The rally was for Kelly-Jay Keen, aka Posie Parker, who is one of the most high profile members of the UK anti-trans movement. A supporter of far-right goon Tommy Robinson, Parker has long used an image of Barbie dressed in a Nazi uniform as her online avatar and has urged men to take guns into toilets to “protect women” from trans people. She has also posted videos promising that women who oppose her views will be “annihilated”.

    Remember the song “close to you” by The Carpenters? Replace birds with Nazis in the line “why do birds suddenly appear every time you are near?” and you’ve got a great theme tune for Parker. When she held a rally in Glasgow’s George Square a few weeks ago, the neo-nazis of Patriotic Alternative were there to lend their support. When she held a rally in Brighton in September, the neo-nazis of Hearts of Oak were there to lend their support. And when she held a rally in January, one of her speakers happily quoted Adolf Hitler while evidence emerged of Facebook discussions where her supporters invited known neo-Nazi groups along on the understanding that they wouldn’t say or do anything racist.

    I wonder what it is about the far right view-spouting, violance-advocating, Nazi-imagery-using Parker that makes her so attractive to neo-nazis? Maybe we’ll never know.

    The event, like Parker’s other events, was titled Let Women Speak. Here’s a photo from the event showing a woman trying to speak.

    The woman wanted to disagree with the views Parker and her fellow travellers were spouting. So Parker’s private security, cisgender men, grabbed her by the throat and wrestled her to the ground.

    It’s notable that even given all the above, very few people in the so-called Gender Critical movement are distancing themselves from this. They can’t help it if Nazis share their reasonable concerns! The organisers of the rally refuse to condemn the actual Nazis who rallied to their cause, claiming instead that the Nazis were actually there to stand with the trans people. Which is an interesting take on black-shirted thugs seig-heiling and shouting at trans people while waving a banner that says DESTROY PAEDO FREAKS.

    For the gendercrits, the presence of Nazis is actually helpful. They can look at the Nazis and persuade themselves that because they’re not that extreme, they can’t be the baddies.

    But of course, they are. The neo-Nazis at these rallies, and outside Drag Queen Story Hours, and outside school libraries, are the very people the gendercrits’ stochastic terrorism is designed to attract. The anti-trans movement can whip up the hatred, but when the thugs start cracking heads they can reassure themselves that they’re not the violent ones.

    When we tell you that the anti-trans movement is a fascist one, we’re not exaggerating. We’re not Rick from The Young Ones calling everything “fascist”. We’re pointing out that this is a movement that for many years has had strong, demonstrable links with actual neo-Nazis and their smiling, suited political enablers.

    As this cartoon puts it:

    When people tell you who they are, believe them.

  • Baa baa bullshit

    When I was young, the press routinely made up stories about the “loony left”. Probably the most famous one is the story that nurseries were getting kids to sing “baa baa green sheep” instead of “baa baa black sheep” because the nursery rhyme was racist.

    It sounds ridiculous, I know, but it was a deliberate campaign against the Labour Party and other progressives. British tabloids ran some 3,000 news stories about such “loony left” ideas between 1981 and 1987; the vast majority were either partially or wholly fabricated and were targeted against the handful of London councils under Labour control.

    Very similar stories were fabricated about the European Union too, most notably by a young journalist called Boris Johnson. 

    This week, the Daily Mail ran a front page story about the charity Oxfam banning the words “mother” and “father”. The Times and other right-wing papers ran with it too, and it was the topic of angry discussion online and on shows such as Good Morning Britain.

    You can guess where this is going.

    Oxfam hasn’t banned anything, and it hasn’t told people that they can’t say mother or father. In a piece of guidance specifically referring to the use of language when you’re talking to trans and non-binary people,  it recommends using gender neutral language if you’re unsure what terms the people you’re talking to prefer.

    If you look at the document it’s very clear that that’s the case, but the version used by the newspapers has been deliberately cropped to remove the context by its source, a high profile anti-trans activist and friend of JK Rowling. In some cases, at the very end of the article in the bit most people don’t read, the newspaper reports admit that the document doesn’t say what the article’s entire premise is based upon. But they got their headline, and that’s what matters when you’re waging a war on human rights.

    “Oxfam tells staff: stop saying mother and father”, The Times thunders.

    It’s baa baa bullshit.

  • I’ll go full diva any day now

    I’m excited, delighted and absolutely stunned to be nominated in the 2023 British Book Awards, aka The Nibbies, for book of the year in the Discover category. When I see the company Carrie Kills A Man is in, I can only assume that somebody has made a terrible mistake. But until that’s discovered, I’m going to become even more egotistical and insufferable than I already was.

    Crap jokes aside, I am incredibly grateful not just to team 404 Ink but to everybody who’s helped spread the word about my book. As I keep on saying, book people are the best people.

  • Another smoking gun

    This, by Jude Doyle, is horrifying: more email evidence of how the Christian Right is pulling the strings of the anti-trans movement, this time in pushing the narrative of “detrans” people or “detransitioners”, people who undergo (or sometimes just propose to undergo) transition and then change their minds. The piece describes a huge and highly effective media machine that takes care of every detail, right down to writing the words it wants detransitioners to mime.

    At the beginning of her gender-critical career, Shupe’s public voice was more or less her own; that is, she actually gave the interviews and wrote the blog posts that appeared under her name. As Shupe entered the world of the Christian right, however, her voice was increasingly retooled or outright manufactured by her handlers.

    Sullivan quickly took over Shupe’s public image, instructing her to refer all requests for interviews or public appearances to him. In an email chain dated April 2019, he told her not to talk to a Washington Post reporter he deemed trans-friendly, and directed her to what he called “good Catholic media sources.” In another April 2019 email, Sullivan provided Shupe with what he called an “outline” for an op-ed, along with instructions for pitching: “You should shop it to the main liberal papers offering it to each one for 24 hours before offering it to a new one. After about four or five, you could then offer it to some more ‘conservative’ papers until you get one to bite.” The “outline” provided by Sullivan was a full essay of 1,609 words. One sentence was typed in red, indicating that Shupe should fill in the details herself. 

    This is clearly happening in the UK too.

    If you’re a reader of the (Glasgow) Herald, this bit might jump out at you:

    “ADF has some excellent writers familiar with the length and style that appeals to op-ed page editors, who could take even a very rough sketch or outline of thoughts from you—or just talk with you—and then create a draft that I think you will be very happy with.” 

    The ADF’s Lois McLatchie has popped up in The Herald’s pages several times recently as a columnist, and her columns are very good at what they do; unfortunately what they do is attempt to excuse the inexcusable and wage war on human rights. That The Herald publishes them without context is an indication not just of how effective the ADF’s machine is, but also how debased our journalistic institutions have become.

    The piece makes it clear, yet again, that none of this is about “protecting children” or “protecting women”. It’s a religious war.

    “I was gradually waking up to the fact that, you know, I was just a useful idiot, are the two words I would use,” Shupe tells me. “I got the vibe that they wanted me to help them, they wanted me to use them, but they wouldn’t trust somebody like me around their kids.” 

  • Incompetence and malevolence

    A superb piece by Parker Molloy on the awful people dominating the discourse around trans people.

    When you’re discussing a topic solely on the grounds of whether or not someone is allowed to talk about something, you’re able to completely sidestep ever having to address the actual content. If you want to have a “discussion” about something, then discuss it.

    But instead, these guys all stand around having a “discussion” about whether or not they’re even allowed to have discussions, despite regularly having this content-free meta-debate in front of massive audiences that critics can’t match.

    It allows them to avoid ever having to actually say anything. And they know it.

    It’s a typically good, well-researched and cited piece, and it goes to the heart of the problem over the so-called trans debate: it’s not a debate. One side publishes or broadcasts a constant flow of bullshit, and as soon as they’re criticised they retreat behind their cancel culture wagons.

    And that’s because all of these stories “just asking questions” aren’t about trying to figure out a world where we can all exist, but what society should do about us and tous. We are not included in this discussion, and our efforts to participate in it at our smaller blogs and newsletters, etc. never gain traction. Instead, it’s, “Hey, look, a trans person tweeted an insult at me, see how unreasonable they are?”

    We have a right to be a part of this conversation, and when we push back on things like publishing a glowing review of a book written by an anti-trans activist that’s filled with straight-up false information that demonstrates that the book hasn’t been fact-checked properly (see? there’s that word again, properly) and is written by someone who is friendly with the author, it’s not us saying, “OMG, you’re not allowed to write about this! OMG! Stoppppppp!” it’s us saying, “You’re not upholding even the tiniest, most minimal standards. You are letting your biases run wild and you are failing at the very concept of journalism.”

    Not to mention that a year later, the author of that book (that got the glowing NYT review) would call trans people “a huge problem to a sane world,” “damaged,” and then say she wanted “reducing or keeping down the number of people who transition.”

    As Sally Claire recalls her university journalism tutor saying: “If someone says it’s raining, and another person says it’s dry, it’s not your job to quote them both. Your job is to look out the fucking window and find out which is true.” Too many journalists would rather brick the fucking windows up so nobody can call out their incompetence and malevolence.

  • We don’t want to die

    I’m aware that I’ve written a few posts recently about the deaths of young trans women, largely from suicide. Let’s look into that a little bit.

    There’s a famous statistic that says 41% of trans people have attempted suicide at some point in their life. It’s from a US study of trans people, and the number is often used online by anti-trans bigots urging us to “join the 41%”. There’s quite a lot of literature on this subject now, and if you do a literature review you’ll find that the numbers are pretty consistent: globally, 32% to 50% of trans people say they’ve attempted suicide at least once. The number of people with ideation, which is when you make plans but don’t go through with them, is higher still.

    That’s much, much higher than in the wider population. Sticking with the US, the National Survey on Drug Use and Health found that 4.3% of Americans said they had had suicidal thoughts in the previous year.

    So. For the population as a whole, suicidal ideation affects 4.3%. For the trans population, more than 41%.

    What’s the difference? Here’s a clue. In the latest study of trans and non-binary youth in the US, the study found that people who underwent affirming healthcare – such as hormone therapy – had a lower rate of suicidal ideation than the wider population: just 3.5%.

    What’s the difference between 3.5% and 41%? Support. Many older trans people have encountered all kinds of issues around being trans: staying in the closet for years, difficulties in obtaining healthcare, societal disapproval, familial ostracism, loneliness, discrimination, hate speech, sexual assault… you know the kind of thing.

    But when trans people are supported, given the healthcare they need and the support they deserve, they get happier.

    From the study:

    During the study period, appearance congruence, positive affect, and life satisfaction increased, and depression and anxiety symptoms decreased. Increases in appearance congruence were associated with concurrent increases in positive affect and life satisfaction and decreases in depression and anxiety symptoms.

    Healthcare in “making people better” shocker.

    The problem isn’t who we are. It’s how so many of us are treated because of who we are. That isn’t an us problem. That’s a you problem (or if you’re one of the good people, a them problem). Trying to “eliminate transgenderism”, or just turning a blind eye to the destruction of our rights and healthcare by those who want to, has a body count.

  • Her name was Eden

    I don’t usually post content warnings but be aware that this story is really horrific. I’m writing it on the basis of information collated by Eden’s friends and by journalist Erin Reed. If more details emerge to confirm or contradict the details here, I’ll update the post.

    Her name was Eden Knight. “Eden was funny, sharp, well-read and concerned with making the world a better place,” her friends say. She lived in the US, where she appeared to be living her best life. Two days ago, she killed herself.

    Eden came from a rich Saudi family and was attending college in the US. She came out as trans during COVID. And in Summer 2022, she explained in her final note, she was approached by a friendly “fixer” hired by her family who said his goal was to find a way to rebuild the bridges burnt between her and her parents. The fixer also suggested he could solve her immigration status, as she was living in the US illegally.

    “I thought this was impossible,” she wrote. “I’m transgender and they are strict conservative Muslims, but I decided I would give it a shot because it can’t hurt right lmao?”

    According to Eden’s note, the fixer and his associate took her under his wing. After a “traumatic event” he encouraged her to move from Georgia, where she lived, to Virginia, where she would be looked after by one of the man’s associates. Eden was initially pampered, but the tone began to change and Eden appears to have been subject to a clumsy attempt at conversion therapy. “I did not realize fast enough what was happening because I’m fucking stupid,” she wrote.

    After a few months “I realised I was entirely dependent on [the associate] for food and shelter.” The fear of deportation kept her from running away. “I did everything he asked,” she wrote. “I cut my hair, I stopped taking estrogen, I changed my wardrobe, I met my dad… my mom kept telling me to repent or I was going to helm and I did, I repented.”

    The associate booked Eden on a flight to Saudi Arabia and she was returned to her parents. After a month of apparent normality, things changed. “I was subjected to daily searches of my belongings, my mom searched all of my electronics whenever she got the chance. I was berated for being a freak when my mom found my private photos, my dad called me a failure and an abomination.” Her parents found her HRT on multiple occasions and confiscated it.

    “They have found my HRT again, and I am done fighting,” Eden wrote two days ago. “This time I am done. I am tired.”

    She ended her message with a wish. “I hope that the world gets better for us. I hope our people get old.”

    Her suicide note was posted online yesterday morning. In the afternoon, her family posted the official notification of her death. She was deadnamed and misgendered throughout.