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What people search for. Oh my [language NSFW]

It’s always amusing – and occasionally depressing – to have a look at your website stats to see how people arrived. Here’s some of the search strings that landed people here:

IR camera see through which fabrics

I may be small I may look sweet ringtone

Free zoo porn

Jade Goody

Fucking Japan Giles

Man has 2 dicks

Angelina Parenting

Men shaging wemen

Men who like to be dildoed

Scottish bukkake

Nightshot infrared see through clothes

Roy chubby brown dad fuck off black

Gary tits

On a brighter note, if you’ve ever wondered whether you should post stuff you’ve learnt – such as rants about health things you’ve experienced, or problems you’ve had with specific companies – the answer appears to be “yes, you should”. Blog posts about things I’ve dealt with (travelling with babies, dealing with colic, run-ins with particular companies…) are being read too, often by more people than the ones searching for cameras that can see through clothes or men with two dicks.

8 replies on “What people search for. Oh my [language NSFW]”

> Scottish bukkake? I don’t even want to know…

God help me, I just thought about what that might entail. An overweight Dundonian horse-frightener with a face like a plasterer’s radio.

/pours bleach in eyes

You should start posting entries on your tits. Go with what the public wants, I reckon.

Can I just say that “moobs” is one of my favourite words? (No, I can’t)

The most popular post on my blog is titled “How to bypass a background check”, so some of the search engine terms put in to find that one are quite interesting. Just today there was “how to fake disclosure scotland”, “how to run my own background check”, and “background + tips not to disclose”. I must be bookmarked in half of Britain’s prisons.

Other terms include “mother daughter naked”, “shithole”, and “mind-numbing bore”.

My most popular search terms are all related to Jade Goody unfortunately.

Recently, Jade Goody was diagnosed with cancer. Bad Times.

Over the next two days my blog suddenly gets twice as many visitors seeking nude photos of Britain’s most recent cancer victim. Good times!

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