David’s selling a phone for me on eBay, and the first listing was invaded by scammers. Relisted with the usual “I’ll only deliver to the UK” stuff and the following bit of blah:

This is a re-listing thanks to time-wasters, so unfortunately I need to take a few steps to avoid the scammers. I’m afraid I’ll only accept PayPal, I’ll only deliver to a verified PayPal address and I won’t sell outwith the auction, so please don’t email me offering a million jillion pounds if I promise to end the auction immediately and send the phone to your brother-in-law who lives on Mars.

Auction progresses, auction ends, winning bidder is from the UK, invoice sent. Winning bidder replies with a different email address and says:

Please deliver to my home address in Nigeria.

*bangs head off desk*