New MPAA boss Dan Glickman is expected to announce an RIAA-style wave of lawsuits against movie file sharers later today. Defamer has a typically scathing interpretation:

Glickman took a reflective pause before explaining, “See, the way it works is we dangle the carrot, then when a file-sharer reaches for it, we wiggle the stick so they know what we’re packing, We ask them, ‘Are you sure you want to do that? Didn’t you see the stick?’ And if they insist on going for the carrot, we beat them to death with the stick, you know, just until we can see a little brain through the skull. That’s why you need the stick and the carrot both. It’s really hard to kill someone with a carrot.”