That’s me in the corner

I’m not a particularly ambitious person, but for years and years I’ve wanted to have a column where I can bang on about sod all – and from this month, I’ve got one in .net [which, post-redesign, is gorgeous. The mag, I mean. Not my bit] And you know what? I finally saw it this morning and my immediate reaction is… I’m absolutely shitting myself.

I don’t really know why, because obviously my name’s been attached to everything I’ve ever written (and while it’s scary to see your own face on a printed page, quite a few mags run writer pics and terrify their readers with my increasingly shiny head). It’s completely illogical to be scared, then, but that doesn’t stop me from bricking it.

I suspect it’s because I buy most magazines for their columns, so for example while I reckon Edge is a great gaming title I’d probably stop buying it if the columns disappeared. So now I’m not just comparing myself with other freelance writers, but with the writers who are responsible for me spending an awful lot of cash on dead trees. And of course, I reckon they’re all much better writers than I am – so if I want to keep doing this, I’ll need to raise my game accordingly. I’ve written two so far and believe me, I’ve written entire books in less time than those two 500-word bits of blah.

Still, it’ll impress my mum…