Suppose the CEO of Wal-Mart came to Congress demanding a $50 million program to deploy FBI agents to frisk suspicious-looking teens in towns near Wal-Marts. A lawmaker might, without for one instant doubting that shoplifiting is a bad thing, question whether this is really the optimal use of federal law enforcement resources. The CEO indignantly points out that shoplifting kills one million adorable towheaded orphans each year. The proof is right here in this study by the Wal-Mart Institute for Anti-Shoplifting Studies. The study sources this dramatic claim to a newspaper article, which quotes the CEO of Wal-Mart asserting (on the basis of private data you can’t see) that shoplifting kills hundreds of orphans annually. And as a footnote explains, it seemed prudent to round up to a million. I wish this were just a joke, but as readers of my previous post will recognize, that’s literally about the level of evidence we’re dealing with here.

EU SAYS WATER IS NOT HEALTHY

In a scarcely believable ­ruling, a panel of experts threw out a claim that regular water consumption is the best way to rehydrate the body.

The bizarre diktat from Brussels has far-reaching implications for member states, including Britain, as no water sold in the EU can now claim to protect against dehydration.

Any producer breaching the order, signed by European Commission President Jose Manuel Barroso, faces being jailed for up to two years.

The Guardian:

This isn’t really a rule so much as a piece of advice, which member states are free to interpret as they wish… The claim wasn’t submitted for a genuine product, but was created as a deliberate ‘test’ exercise by the two professors, who were apparently already unhappy with the European Food Standards Authority. The panel were well aware of it’s absurdity too, noting drily that “the proposed risk factors,” the conditions addressed by the hypothetical product, in this case water loss, “are measures or water depletion and thus are measures of the disease (dehydration).”

Executive summary: the EFSA decided to be pedantic, and point out that water alone doesn’t prevent dehydration; you need sufficient water, as well as various other odds and sods such as salt.

The Guardian, again:

So the ruling seems pretty sensible to me, or at least as sensible as a ruling can be when the claim being tested is vexatious in the first place. It’s accurate advice, and it prevents companies selling bottled water from making exaggerated claims for their products, which is a good thing.

Comment on the Express article:

This must be the same group of so called scientist that made the false claim that man and CO2 is causing global warming. No wonder no body has any respect for science anymore.

Nine children at two Hove schools have been diagnosed with the potentially fatal infectious disease in the past couple of weeks – more than the entire number of cases in the whole of Sussex last year.

…In some cases babies too young to be vaccinated have contracted the illness from contact with infected older children who have not been given the jabs.

The tweets were about aspartame, and I felt that Ellory was rehashing internet conspiracy theory nonsense and being dismissive of anyone who disagreed. I still think that, but my original post was over the top.

It’s turned into a fun discussion thread, though.

The real story, in the Irish Times: the average cost of a Ryanair flight increased by 13% over the last year, and it’s about to go up again.

At a press briefing in Dublin, deputy chief executive Michael Cawley said that to “stand still” next year, the airline would have to increase fares by €3 a passenger to cover the increase in its fuel costs.

The story most people will see, in The Sun:

RYANAIR is planning to screen PORN on its flights.

we here at The Consumer Reporter London Online News are a little skeptical and aren’t sure that we’ve seen any real proof that these pills work for weight loss. So we decided to put these products to the test. What better way to find out the truth than to conduct our own study?

You’ve got to love the disclaimer, though.

It is important to note that this site and the comments/answers depicted above is to be used as an illustrative example of what some individuals have achieved with this/these products. This website, and any page on the website, is based loosely off a true story, but has been modified in multiple ways including, but not limited to: the story, the photos, and the comments. Thus, this page, and any page on this website, are not to be taken literally or as a non-fiction story. This page, and the results mentioned on this page, although achievable for some, are not to be construed as the results that you may achieve on the same routine. I UNDERSTAND THIS WEBSITE IS ONLY ILLUSTRATIVE OF WHAT MIGHT BE ACHIEVABLE FROM USING THIS/THESE PRODUCTS, AND THAT THE STORY/COMMENTS DEPICTED ABOVE IS NOT TO BE TAKEN LITERALLY.

It is understandable that people are concerned about mobile phones, especially because they are so widely used. But so far, the published studies do not show that mobile phones could increase the risk of cancer.  This conclusion is backed up by the lack of a solid biological mechanism, and the fact that brain cancer rates are not going up significantly.

However, all of the studies so far have weaknesses, which make it impossible to entirely rule out a risk. Mobile phones are still a new technology and there is little evidence about effects of long-term use.

For this reason, the UK Government advises a precautionary stance. It suggests that if adults want to use a mobile phone, they can choose to minimise their exposure by keeping calls short. It also advises discouraging children under the age of 16 from making non-essential calls as well as also keeping their calls short.

And, as IARC’s working group said, there needs to be more research.

Amazingly, I have an opinion about that.

“Shareholders and customers of BT and TalkTalk might ask why so much time and money has been spent challenging the act to help reduce the illegal traffic on their networks,” BPI boss Geoff Taylor said. “You’re all our bitches now.”

OK, he didn’t say that last bit. But it’s true all the same. If BT and TalkTalk don’t appeal, we’re stuffed.

The entire planet’s gross domestic product is $69 trillion per year.

What are they thinking? Let The Register explain.

The idea that the industry could ask for trillions in damages apparently springs from a previous success against Usenet in 2009, in which copying of a relatively small number of works (878) was multiplied by the maximum penalty to arrive at a damages bill close to US$6.6 million.

If it weren’t scaremongering bullshit that will misinform those who do not understand that their news source makes up any old rubbish, it’d be hilarious.

not one of the 12 cases reported in the 1998 Lancet paper was free of misrepresentation or undisclosed alteration, and that in no single case could the medical records be fully reconciled with the descriptions, diagnoses, or histories published in the journal.

While the notional worth of the 1.2bn illegal downloads was almost £1bn, the BPI estimated the actual loss from “forgone spend” was £219m in 2010.

Andrew Orlowski at The Register has a wonderful take on the news:

The British record industry group estimates there are 8 million people, or 23 per cent of the UK online population, using P2P software.

That means around two-thirds to three-quarters of people don’t indulge in piracy – a figure rarely mentioned in this debate, and a remarkable figure considering the risk of being caught (which are negligible) and potential savings (which are considerable). That means most people are fairly honest, and a considerable amount of money is not being tapped by the legitimate music business.

The BPI figures also neglect to mention that the music business is growing. Yes, sales of physical products are declining, but overall it’s party time. A report by PRS last year showed a changing industry:

retail product sales have declined, but the other parts of the industry have grown noticeably more than the decline in retail sales. This growth has come from a few sources. Live show attendance has increased more than retail sales have decreased. Consumers have actually spent more. On top of that, the business to business side of the industry (sponsorships, licensing, advertisements, etc.) has grown as well, opening up new and lucrative means of making money.

It’s not all good. There are real concerns that the money’s coming largely from established acts, the U2s and the Muses and the Rihannas and so on: they get a disproportionate share of the money pie, and there are fears that there isn’t another generation of enormo-acts behind them.

That may be true, but the reason for that isn’t piracy: it’s a whole mess of factors including an increasingly fragmented media landscape, the rise of alternative forms of entertainment such as videogames and so on.

Another big factor is the way in which record companies have changed: increasingly the landscape is one of mega-corporations whose need to satisfy shareholders means they want results now, not ten years from now. As the cliche goes, if U2 were around today, they probably wouldn’t get signed – and if they did get signed, they’d be dropped before their third album.

Over at No Rock, Simon H B adds:

Taylor [Geoff Taylor of the BPI] ends with a plea for more legislation. The BPI always think that what is needed is more unenforceable legislation.

How could the record labels ensure their demands get a sympathetic hearing? Here’s one idea: Private Eye reports that Universal Music gave £80,000 to the Tories in July.

Back to Simon:

The trouble is, with the bunch of turnips sitting in Westminster at the moment, they might get their wish. More time, money and effort trying to buck the marketplace. It’ll still fail, though.